The first chapter was all about how all of us are imperfect, and because of that we shouldn't judge others. How sin doesn't so much reflect the parent as it does the child's heart. In that moment I was convicted to pray for Cooper's heart. The example as given of the ultimate parent: God. In the garden of eden it was God, Adam, and Eve. God was the parent, Adam and Eve the children. Adam and Eve's disobedience was not a reflection of God, rather a reflection of their heart. So, I've been praying for Cooper's heart. Praying for strength not to judge others. Praying that I can parent like God. With a good balance of discipline and love. Yes, the first chapter provided lots of good nuggets for me.
The second chapter provided even more. Children learn to relate to God through our example. They closely identify us with God. So how is Cooper identifying God because of my example to him? I can never perfectly reflect God. So instead of being a perfect reflection, my goal should be that my reflection draws Cooper closer to HIM - longing to touch the real thing. I hope my parenting allows Cooper to draw an accurate picture of God in his heart. This comes through the balance (a lot of times it seems like tension) between loving our children unconditionally and teaching them the consequences of sin. Yes, even more for me to contemplate, learn from.
Today I read the third chapter. It didn't let me down. Still so much more to chew on. It was all about the heart of obedience. Until Cooper learns to obey out of his own choice, he is going to see how much he can get away with with out getting caught. To get cooper to the point where he chooses to obey on his own, I must teach his heart and discipline is flesh. I need to teach Cooper the reasons he wants to obey God. I don't want him to obey because he's afraid, but because he knows it's the right thing to do and because it pleases God. I can do this by 1)Teaching Cooper what God says about his wrongdoing. 2) allowing Cooper's wrongdoings to be a time of teaching, not just reprimanding. 3) Tell Cooper how his words and actions affect others.
This book not only has godly insight, but at the end of each chapter provides a toolbox with different strategies to help your child in the way the chapter encourages. Chapter 2 had a list of scriptures for different struggles children have (anger, lying, respect for parents, sibling rivalry, etc) and Chapter 3 gave stores and ways to teach your children lessons about those same things.
I was reading through the toolboxes today, asking God to show me ways to help Cooper, when I was convicted of some of the things I was reading. Not only does Cooper need to be disciplined, but I do as well. There are scriptures that I need to go to for myself, not just Cooper. I'm supposed to be reflecting God to Cooper. How am I supposed to do that if I'm not covered in God's word.
I'm thankful for this book. Thankful that God is teaching me how to be a better mom, but today, teaching me to be a better daughter, sister, wife, friend. I can't do it unless I am in God's word, letting it change me, mold me, and make me better.
PS. The book is called Creative Parenting, by Lisa Welchel (the lady who played Blair on the facts of life). If you've found this post at all helpful, I say go get it.
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