belong.

I was tucking my sweet boy in bed. Giving him lots of love, reviewing the day's events. At the beginning of the summer it was revealed to me how I need to tell Cooper that he was important. So, the bed-time conversation went like this:

Me: "You are important."
Coop: "No."
Me: "Yes. You are very important."
Coop: "No, I don't belong to you."
Me: "Who do you belong to?"
Coop: "Florida!" (apparently he misses that state)

I laughed my way down the stairs considering this sweet conversation. As I picked up crumbs from dinner, I pondered it more. I find it amazing that a three year old associated the work important with belonging. In his brain important and belonging were one in the same.

And so, that night after I tucked Cooper into bed, I prayed, "God, show me ways I can show Cooper he is important. Show me how I can help him realize he belongs to me, but most importantly, You." I've prayed this over and over the past couple of weeks. Here's what God has shown me.

Early in our marriage I realized how our home is a huge opportunity to make others feel like they belong. My prayer when I have people at my house is: "Let them know they are loved. Let them know they are important. Let them know this is a safe place. Let them see God." My hope is that I can somehow point them to God, knowing they belong in His family. In our (almost) 7 years of marriage we have hosted family, friends, students, co-workers, and neighbors. When they are in our home, I try my best to show them they belong by:

• a smile
• some yummy food
• good conversation (hopefully!)
• fun
• a hug
• acceptance despite faults

Each one of those things is something that God has provided us to let us know how important we are to him. He gives each one of those things to us. Don't believe me? Here's some scripture to back me up.

• A smile. 
• Psalm 85: 1 "God, you smiled on your good earth." 
• Many times I picture God smiling down on us. When he sees us doing what is right and loving others, he smiles. He smiles on us with his whole being. How amazing to see that smile in person one day!
• Some yummy food.  
• John 6:30-37: They waffled: "Why don't you give us a clue about who you are, just a hint of what's going on? When we see what's up, we'll commit ourselves. Show us what you can do. Moses fed our ancestors with bread in the desert. It says so in the Scriptures: 'He gave them bread from heaven to eat.'"  Jesus responded, "The real significance of that Scripture is not that Moses gave you bread from heaven but that my Father is right now offering you bread from heaven, the real bread. The Bread of God came down out of heaven and is giving life to the world." They jumped at that: "Master, give us this bread, now and forever!" Jesus said, "I am the Bread of Life. The person who aligns with me hungers no more and thirsts no more, ever. I have told you this explicitly because even though you have seen me in action, you don't really believe me. Every person the Father gives me eventually comes running to me. And once that person is with me, I hold on and don't let go."
• I love this! Jesus is our bread. He is our bread that will satisfy us forever. And did you catch that last part? Once we are with him, he holds on and doesn't let go. We belong.
• Good conversation.
• Luke 11: 1-4 - One day he was praying in a certain place. When he finished, one of his disciples said, 'Master, teach us to pray just as John taught his disciples.' So he said, "When you pray, say 'Father, reveal who you are. Set the world right. Keep us alive with three square meals. Keep us forgiven with you and forgiving others. Keep us safe from ourselves and the Devil.'
• Prayer is our conversation with God. We are to go to him with praise, thanksgiving, our fears, our excitements, our anger, our joy, the things we need help with. It's the greatest conversation. This passage continues on about how we are to continue asking God for things, continue talking. Other scripture reminds us to pray all the time. Continuously. Constant conversation with our Father.
• Fun.
• John 10:10 - I came so they can have real and eternal life, more and better life than they ever dreamed of.
• This life is not meant to be so serious. Jesus came to give us life! Ecclesiastes tells us to enjoy our life. Do the things that make us happy. I often think about Jesus and his disciples sitting around playing games. I think they did lots of they could to have some fun and laugh.
• A hug.
• Psalm 9:9-10 - God's a safe-house for the battered, a sanctuary during bad times. The moment you arrive, you relax; you're never sorry you knocked.
• Hugs make you feel safe. They let you know you're loved. When I greet people, I often hug them. When they arrive I want them to relax, never sorry they knocked on my door. God often gives us hugs. He keeps us safe. He protects us, he shades us. He is our hug.
• Acceptance despite faults.
• Psalm 85: 7 - Show us how much you love us, God! Give us the salvation we need!
• God showed us his love when he gave us salvation. Despite our faults, God chose to love us and give is a way. No matter what I've done or will do, salvation is the love I needed. God has accepted me, given me hope, despite my faults.

So, I think God has answered my prayer. The way I can show Cooper that he belongs to God is to smile, give him hugs, offer him yummy food, have good conversation with him, and accept/love him despite his faults.

How do you show your children that they are important - not only to you, but to God?